DAWGS BURY WHININ' GATERS, ARE
IMMUNE TO CAT SCRATCH FEVER
Lucius "Gater" Bates wuz waitin'
on the Bubba Ray Brigade when they arrived in Lot "K"
by the old Gater Bowl. He had done been there livin' in his Orange
& Blue school bus fer eleven days and wuz right gamey smellin'
like rotten mullet. Well, he started mouthin' off right away to
Eunice Wylene and she grabbed the feller by his lizard neck and
squeezed so hard that his flappy earlobes turned Orange &
Blue. Then she told Toole Shedd to hold the boy down whilst Phoole
the Mule backed up and drop kicked 'im right across the Saint
Johnny River so far than he wuz last seen flyin' through the plate
glass winder of a Nassau County Waffle House.
It wuz a wunnerful day. "Sports Model" Higginbotham
whispered in Pecker Osburn's ear that she wuz wearin' a new Red
& Black thong, and the feller looked at her feet and said
he didn't see no flip flops. All went purdy well, 'cept they wouldn't
let Polly Esther into the stadium when they discovered her 357
Magnum in her supp hose. And they wouldn't let Bubba Ray and Skeeter
carry in two cases a Jimmy Beam and a keg a Pabst Blue Ribbon.
It wuz fun though. Afore the game some little pipsqueek pimply
Gater feller comes up to Figerin' Perry and axed him, "How
long has it been since ya' whupped the Gaters?" and Figerin'
Perry saw the same little creepy feller after the game and he
answers "'bout 10 minutes ago." Ever body wanted to
git cleaned up after the game, but there weren't no water pressure
in Duval County with 65,000 Gaters washin' their "Dawgs Suck"
white shoe polish off'n their back winders.
On the way home, Bubba Ray knowed he had to avoid Sheriff Ish
"Stan" Bull who would be settin' up a roadblock jest
inside the Georgia line. So Bubba Ray disquised hisself as a slab
a ribs and hid hisself on the back a Ice & Tread Beulow's
flatbed. Well, when they got stopped, Eunice Wylene started yellin'
at the Sheriff's deputy, Deputy I. B. Skinnie, and she sez, she
sez, "the varmit is in the back lookin' like a dadgum slab
a Bono's Ribs." So Deputy I. B. Skinnie starts hosin' off
Bubba Ray's hot barbeque sauce and when his Red & Black flannel
shirt becomes evident, the feller jumped down and skeedaddled
into the piney woods toward Jesup. We shore hope the boy gits
away and shows up in Canetuck. Hope he can outrun them blood hounds.
Them Gaters stopped growlin'
while them Dawgs started howlin'
Gaters seemed to want Steve
while they all rushed to leave
Now them Dawgs face a Cat
& that Cat will be scratchin'
But our Dawgs will be ready
while Gibson keeps on catchin'
It ain't easy in Canetucky
& them Dawgs must shore beware
Them Wild Cats can be lucky
& might give us quite a scare
But them Dawgs know where they're
goin'
they can't wait to hit The Plains
David Greene will keep on throwin'
Ware & Brown produce more gains
It is gettin' down to crunch time
& them Dawgs have gotta win
Champeen Dawgs score 46
& Canetuck will git jest 10!!
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